You are engaged - congratulations! Undoubtedly, immediately after your friends and family squeal with delight over your news, the first question they will ask is, "So when is the date?" It can be somewhat annoying, especially if you are very recently engaged, but really all your loved ones are asking so they can mentally save the date.
So begins your wedding planning. Obviously the first thing you need to do is start viewing places for your ceremony and reception, because without those there is no wedding.
Once you have nailed down your wedding's place and date - then its time to get the word out. This is especially important if you are having your wedding during peak wedding season (usually the spring, early summer) or over any holiday weekend. Keep in mind, that while surely your guests are looking forward to celebrating with you, they can have conflicts. Wedding season unfortunately conflicts with graduation season, and long weekends are usually booked up with vacation plans way in advance.
If possible, you want to send your ‘save the date’ cards out 6-9 months in advance. Lean toward the longer end of that spectrum if you have guests coming long distance or if you have a popular wedding date booked.
Now comes the fun part… What should they look like? Do they have to match? Who should I send them to? What should my save the dates say? How much information do I need to include? The answer to all those questions is easy. It’s entirely up to you and your fiance. As long as the most important information is on there - your names and your date - all the rest will click into place. However, to help guide you through the decision making we offer these words of advice.
What Should They Look Like?
‘Save the dates’ are your opportunity to get the word
out about your approaching wedding in a fun, expressive way. ‘Save
the date’ announcements can be more casual than your more
formal wedding invitation. However, keep in mind this is your chance
to create a first impression. Your guests will receive your save
the date and start forming impressions on what kind of event it
will be. So we suggest you be unique, but use high quality materials.
Nothing sends the wrong message like flimsy materials.
Do They Have To Match?
It’s up to you. They don't have to match the rest of your
wedding, but they can. If you are the kind of person who has been
dreaming of what your wedding would look like even before you were
engaged then perhaps you have some ideas already for colour themes,
design styles, etc. If that's the case, great! If not, do not worry.
The priority is to get those save the dates in the mail so you get
on your guests' calendars. Another consideration, if you are the
latter personality with your wedding plans all mapped out, you are
going to be seeing a lot of those colours or design decisions over
the upcoming months - so much so that you might get a little sick
of your chosen colours! The ‘save the date’ offers the
opportunity to use your second choice color ideas, just to mix it
up a bit. The point is, if you see something completely unrelated
to your wedding ideas that you absolutely love - go for it!
Who Do I Send Them To?
Lose the notion that the ‘save the date’ has to be sent
to everyone on your list - because it doesn't. In fact, if there
are people on your list that are "obligatory invites"
- people you really have to invite due to family ties or professional
connections - this would be a good time to hold off. I am not saying
do not invite them, but if they only receive the formal invitation
then no harm done. The reality is if you are inviting your boss
to the wedding simply because it's the politically correct thing
to do, then you are probably secretly hoping he/she doesn't come.
Having said all this, I recommend you make sure you send your ‘save
the date’ to people who might interact with each other. Say
you have a distant aunt who you are inviting purely out of family
obligation. Normally you would not send her a ‘save the date’.
However, if your aunt has dinner at your cousin’s house and
sees your ‘save the date’ hanging on her refrigerator,
there might be hurt feelings!
What Should My 'Save The Dates' Say?
How much information do you need to include? The way to think of
save the dates is like providing directions. You are instructing
your guests to ‘save the date,’ and beyond that you
are giving them all the most important information in order to make
arrangements to attend. For a local wedding with not many long distance
guests you could get away with just your names, the date of your
wedding and the town where you will be holding the event. However,
that is rarely the case. Usually couples have information they would
like to communicate. Here are the various ways to do so and things
you can include:
• The date
• Your names
You can keep it casual and just use your first names or if you are
concerned this might confuse your guests you can use both of your
full names. However, the point can be made if your guests don't
know you by your first names, why are they being invited?
• The place:
You really don't need to give them the exact location of you wedding
but just a general region would be a good idea. For example, “SW19”
or “Colchester”
Everything beyond those first three elements is optional.
• Hotel information:
The chances are you are going to be reserving some hotel rooms for
your guests. If you know that information, it would very helpful
to your guests to have it early with your ‘save the date.’
However if haven't yet organised hotels, don't worry. You can include
that information with your formal invitation. If you aren't organizing
hotel rooms for your guests, it’s not a bad idea to recommend
places to stay to your guests.
• Website URL:
Wedding websites are a great idea. It gives you an unlimited place
to communicate all the information you have. It also can be updated
as decisions are made - which should be a great comfort to you.
• Airport information:
If a lot of your guests are flying to your wedding, then you might
want to include how far your ceremony and reception location is
from the airport. Also to note, several of the major airlines will
offer a discount that you can pass onto your guests. You simply
need to call the airlines in advance and explain that you are planning
a large event.
• Car rental information:
Rental companies will do the same as the airlines. They will offer
a discount that you can pass onto your guests. Again, call the car
rental companies in advance and explain that you are planning a
large event.
• Things to do / Places to eat:
This type of information is totally optional but can be a nice touch
for your guests especially if they are coming long distance to attend
your wedding. It could convince your guests to make an extended
weekend of your wedding if you suggest some fun activities for everyone
before and after your wedding. Also, if you have a favourite restaurant
recommendation, it can be a nice personal touch.
• Lastly, be sure to include the text "Formal Invitation
to Follow"
If you don't you will be surprised at how many people will call
you thinking your save the date is your wedding invitation!
Author: Lauren Franklin
Editor: Sam Ketterer
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